Kindness

Dear Haters,

I know you try to make me feel terrible, you want me to crumble. You will take any opportunity to try to make me feel dumb. I will meet you anywhere, a shop, a house, the streets. I see the bitter people with bitter comments. I hear the bitter thoughts and if I care to, I notice the bitter actions. I know you want me to question myself and feel self-consciousness. I know you want me to feel the bug of paranoia, you think it’s okay to build on others backs. You think it’s okay to make those who question you look unreasonable. I know you have a keen sense of desperately wanting others to never reach the levels of their potential. It is clear you all have the same formula, but the same formula means the same puppet dancing to the disgusting pettiness of the five thieves. Instead of taking the opportunity to learn and ask for help, instead of spreading positivity you crawl along in your ego. Instead of listening to what I’ve spoken about, instead of feeling what’s shared you want me to be miserable, you want to keep cutting my wings. I know deep as can be with you... I know you know the worst thing you can do to a survivor is to think you could ever push them down when they have got up, they lifted themselves up. I lifted myself up. I don’t always have to smile at a hater I need to smile because I am me. I want to smile because... life. Things are not always to perfection but I have gathered my ingredients. Perfection is such... I can see the particles shine... I can feel the love that I… May... Not have readily available. It may come to a shock to you but it’s clear to me the person you hate the most is you. I have given kindness in my burning, in my yearning, my hardest of darkness, I have understood I must of course be kind to myself. This is not just your mistake it’s your habit. So thank you for the bitterness it is no different to when I was made to feel like a smudge simply because I existed & now the creative ones have defined themselves to more than you could be ... This is the decision you have made, not me.